TGIF

Thank goodness it's Friday!

Not only am i glad that the weekend is finally here, i must say tt i'm also happy that today's been eventful in a gd way!

Here's how my day went!

6.00 am - Rise and Shine!
7.15 am - Gym with very fit CG mates
9.00 am - Tutorial
11.40 am - Meeting at Dean's Office
12.45 pm - Lunch
1.30 pm - I SAW Jackie Chan!!!
2.00 pm - Tutorial
3.30 pm - Cab down to TTSH
4.00 pm - Buy presents for tutors
6.00 pm - Queue for Starbucks Staff Treat

Firstly, i'm glad that i took the first big step to get my fitness back. I ought to listen to ronnie who told me that exercise is really beneficial, 'cos not only does it keep u fit, it also keeps u mentally alert and helps u sleep better :)
I didnt do much at the Gym today cos i wanted to start slow... but i hope this isnt the first and last time i make the effort to go to the gym!

I got to see Jackie Chan! Though i didnt get close enough to take a good pic of him. Here's some shots i took anyway!


Next highlight of the day is the Starbucks's Treat to TTSH Staff! 50% OFF you know???
It's a bit ironical tt my cg only queue for Starbucks Treat after we leave TTSH.


The long long queue :)
Our buys and happy Gab.


The much talked abt starbucks Tiramisu -> not bad :)
Wenhui and my decent receipt and Gab's atrociously long receipt!
Happy Gab again :)

I was wondering if i'd ever spend more than 100 bucks on starbucks... probably unlikely.

Till i post again, hope my knowledge of psychiatry would have expanded by leaps and bounds! haha

Understanding Food & People

I seriously have no idea why i'm persistently tired... and i really have NO idea why i was obedient enough to go for the sushi making class my mom sign me up for despite countless refusal.

K la.. it wasnt too bad :)


I should really make them when i have the time. I'm sure it'll be a good change from my usual baking!

Food from the past few weeks :)








Meals at waruku comes with a complimentary salad! What a healthy way to start the meal! :)

This week is the first week of Psychiatric Medicine at NUH. Naturally we'll make our way to nus when we can cos there are food we miss when we're posted to other hospitals far far away from nus :) I'm looking fwd to eat my 面搀搀.

On Tues, we met our dearest friends doing orthopaedics for lunch at Megabites.

I had Vegetarian Pesto. Not too bad :) But the tomato-based sauce was a little too sweet for my liking. But thanks to Gab who bought me ginseng tea to (1)WAKE ME UP (2) Counter the sweetness, I was quite happy with lunch on a whole!:)


Last pic here is taken at Zhenzhen's party. I really heart her spread of food and the mini donuts are really cute!


I think i've fulfilled the food part of the title by writing about how i learnt/understood how sushi is made. What about 'Understanding People'? Not surprisingly, i've been learning alot about people from just 3 days of my posting.

Psychiatric illnesses have never been more real to me till i spoke to and see people with them myself. Unfortunately, with the increasing understanding of each condition, it is inevitable that u begin to see some parts of it in yourself.

For example, we were told today that most medical students / doctors have some element of OCD-ness. I thought i may marginally fulfill the criteria for bipolar disorder but i'm now convinced that i do not cos true bipolars fluctate between mania and depression spontaneously without a trigger.

I'm looking forward to learn more! But meanwhile i just hope to break out of this sleepiness cycle, hopefully by the next time i post!

Ultimate Cui-ness

I felt damn shitty today cos there wasnt one full lecture i managed to stay awake for.

Damn cui.
Damn cui.

You know i was so tired that i almost didnt have the energy to eat dinner. Those of you who know me would find it unbelievable... cos most of u know tt hunger can wake me up from sleep if i dont eat enough for dinner!

I was that tired.

If only complaining works for me and i could complain till the cows come home to feel better... but a large part of me is too rational to complain cos i know complaining is more likely to drain me further than really make a difference. hai...

But seriously, i dont think i ever schooled for 17 wks continuously without a break! In sch we always get a break aft every 10 wks.

Then again, I shouldn't be complaining cos
(1) I supposedly had 1.5 days at my disposal aft my test
(2) I'm not doing ortho
(3) I'm not involved in play house

So i can only hope tt an early night today can do me some gd.

Friends who also feel cui, jiayou k! Especially those who dont have (1),(2),(3) even.

Secret OST

This has got to be one of the best OST i own now. When i watched the movie, i was so thankful for having the opportunity to learn the piano. It's a nice thought that i can potentially be very good at piano if i practised. It's good to be hopeful.. when all the if onlys if taken to be possibilities:)

This OST is so happifying :) definitely recommended.

Medicine Posting

[03S78][Good Man Campaign] Yangmehmeh86 says:
did u go sing song with kenny they all todae?

. efeu :: |Chocolated| says:
eh.. i medicine posting leh!


I hope medicine will be over soon and on a nice note too :)

No Time

No time to blog! :(

... till end of Med posting probably.

Meanwhile ivy hopes to be hardworking!

Overdued Photos

I realised i have lots of overdued photos...

Since i have quite a bit of recent photos to upload anyway, might as well collage everything and post everything at one shot!

Shall start froM the most recent :)


Packing of goodie bags for Public Health Screening'07! I was actually damn tired after night call but maybe i wanted to give my boss face, so i went down anyway!
Just look at the sheer number of things we had to pack and the mess we created outside LT 26! Goodness!


My tuition kid's twin sisters! Aren't they cute? Hmm.. Stimes i really envy nobelle for her lack-of-anxiety-ness... though her attitude stimes make me panic even more! Y'know she doesnt keep her exam time table and she only finds out what the next paper is one day before!



One of the days i was early.. i decided to find out what the old and mysterious buildings near the carpark are. They probably belong to the old TTSH as evidence by the last 2 photos!


Some random pictures we took at TTSH during the earlier part of the posting. The guys in my CG were all listening to their hearts cos we realised tt in surgery.. our stethoscopes were really under-utilised!
Second last pic: There're dumplings at TTSH!


Random pictures:
(1) Moon Pies aunt vivian bought for my family! An interesting western twist to mooncakes! Maybe i'll buy them next yr for my CG mates.
(2) Lerk Thai Chicken Noodles... not bad tasting but it gave me a "MSG syndrome" attack. My heart rate was 132 beats/min, i had neck numbness and breathing difficulties! It was awful having to drive in that state and my poor friends were so worried! It certainly didnt help tt it was a long ride to our patient's house at woodlands too!
(3) My Mom's Hamster's bathtub... My mom really dotes on her animals... we dont even have bathtubs but her hamsters do! Gosh.. and she got such a cute one somemore! :)



Very outdated CGH photos!
Can't believe tt i'm at the end of week 6 of Medicine posting. I still feel so inadequate, so chui, so unsure of so many things -sigh-
CGH seems so long ago... but i do miss some parts of my surgery posting like proper medical student lounge, some nice tutors, uro posting etc :)
Picture 1: I took a pic of my access card on the last day! At CGH every student gets to access every corner of the hospital like it's own staff! :)

Picture 2: Cheap and gd chicken rice at a stone throw distance away! I'm sure my friends miss it! :)

Last 4 Pictures: I take Bus #5 to Nobelle's house to give her tuition. One fine Friday, i boarded a very interesting bus #5 with modified seats for advertising purposes! I was quite happy tt i could have a table to rest my book while i read :)

Actually i wanted to post something quick and then either go to bed or read sth useful.. but because my brain is functioning at such a horrendously slow speed, i took longer than expected.

This post's title was supposed to be "Ambivalent again" But i thought it's a tad too serious for a slow brain to expound on. Hmm.. but indeed, I've been unsure of how i should feel abt a lot of things...
One example is doing night call. Most pple thing it's a waste of time and it is seriously not worth it to be dead tired and non-functional the day after.. but there are really parts of it i really like. Last night, i had to take blood from an old lady. She told me that she's been poked many times and her veins are known to be very challenging. It wasnt difficult to guess also cos she had plaster and bruises all over her arms! I took a very very very long time to find the best vein cos i was determined not to poke her more than once. I kept talking to the grandma to keep her mind off the needle and the best part of it was not only did i find out a lot about her, she didnt even know i have taken a good blood sample :)

All the late nights are sure to make me age faster.. i shall decide on another day if i like night calls or not :)

sigh

I hate it when i'm distracted and lose focus.

Where is my self-discipline?

I wish some things didn't happen...
so disruptive...

this justify a real sigh.

sigh.

Analogy

I've been wanting to post abt this for some time but i just keep forgetting!



Anyway, each time i play the piano, esp with pieces that requires a lot of pedal, i'd be reminded of driving a manual car in a bad jam :) In a jam, i'd have to step on the clutch and hold it there cos i will have to change gear 1 to gear 2 and back to 1 repeatedly. Playing pieces that needs the pedal give me the same ache i get when i drive, except i get it on a different foot :) Quite interesting right!

I was also thinking both driving and piano playing requires a lot of coordination too!

Hmm.. i havent been sleeping enough and i must say i'm proud to have survived the day. Perhaps i still have the energy to blog cos for once i have no tuition on Friday!

On a whole, i like my day a lot! I guess it's cos i learnt some really cool stuff today. If you're not a medical student, u might not understand the next chunk of my rumblings. You can ask me to explain when i next see you though!

Did you know that your tongue and pharyngeal muscles are respiratory muscles? This is evident by EEG demonstrating muscle activity that corresponds to respiration. Also, in the event of induced hypercapnia, the muscle activity increases like all other respiratory muscles. When you breathe in, your thoracic cavity increases, that's when pressure falls and a gradient is generate for air to flow in. Now.. the part that amazed me is... Because ur upper airway is not surrounded by the pleura which has (-ve) pressure to keep the lungs stuck to the chest wall, the upper airway has tendency to collapse. Your tongue and pharyngeal muscles have to come in to keep the airway patent. (many other new knowledge amazed me today.. but i should not bore you and i should stop with only one example) :)

Besides getting reminded of my piano and driving have similarities, i realised tt i've been playing my piano quite regularly lately. I dont play for a long time, but a few minutes each day is all i need to make my day complete! It's always so ironic... the more free i am, the more time i waste, the less i accomplish. The busier i am, i seem to have more drive to do more! Being able to play croatian rhapsody (or at least part of it) would be a cool byproduct of my busy medicine schedule. yay :)

I suspect i'm someone who needs to look forward to sth to keep myself going. Perhaps i close my eyes at night looking forward to the wonderful knowledge that awaits to be learnt the next day. I'd wake up looking forward to breakfast, impromptu early morning tut by zhai pple or the hot tea/coffee/yuanyang at ttsh. I'd then look forward to lunch and i'd look fwd to dinner and playing the piano when i'm on my way home. When the new wk starts, I also look forward to weekend to keep myself happy. I'm just forever looking fwd to something i feel.

Well, i have no idea if it's a gd or bad thing. I guess, as long as i'm happy :)

I'm so tired... bedtime soon! :)

Fatigue

I am sooo tired...
ZZzzz

CHUI-ness

I think i am so chui at everything!

As i said before... my technique is so chui, knowledge is so chui, memory also so chui.

If only i can have a scratch of extra brain tissue from pple like matthew, ronnie, ningyan, ningqi or weixiang. I'm sure tt's all i need to do better...

Either that or i get someone to drill things into me everyday.

hai...

My Kor

Just after secretly wishing for my kor to be right here on the same island for several times, he actually called!

This is like the ULTIMATE antidote :)

Also, my kor is actually using iPhone now... Gab, arent u envious?

The good news is that my kor is pretty much happy with everything over his side... from his room, food to weather.

But the BAD news is i might only see him next summer :( :(

Hey kor, thanks for everything :) You still have the same power despite being so far away! I'm so grateful.

Just have to Post

I'm actually incredibly tired after a rather long day and i just typed and sent out the minutes for today's Public Health Screening meeting...but i shall conclude that today is quite an interesting and near fulfilling day! (it'd definitely be fulfilling if i can do my COFM presentation aft this post...)

I like today cos i rmbr it for
1- I elicited my first very beautiful babinski reflex
2- Wenhui and i bought QQ rice
3- Today's Weiyan's bday and it was interesting to see how the guys used a pink razor on him in the LT!
4- I found sth to occupy myself when i'm stuck in a jam! I practised my percussing on ther steering wheel. On one occassion, i accidentally sounded the horn. Opps!
5- I saw someone running alongside the jam at the Benjamin sheares bridge and i thought to myself that it's been a long while since i ran with such nice things to see. I think my last was running in cambridge? New places always have new sights to offer and i enjoyed my run a lot. Lately, i've been boringly running ard the track, wait.. worse now cos i hardly run! Opps :)

I shall hope to break out of my fatigue and lazy cycle soon!
... and i also hope for many more good days to come :)

Lastly, because i'm in the committee, i should put up this poster too!
Tell your relatives to come ok?

Defining Your Day

I was on my way home when i was thought about how nice it'd be if i could identify at least ONE thing each day that made me happy and then rmbr the day for it. So i should start today!

Today is a gd day because:
1. I spoke to a very nice granny who spoke endlessly to let me practise my dialect and she also kindly allowed all my friends to examine her joints.

2. I was able to avoid a MAJOR Jam at PIE by taking all the small roads! Though i'm sure if there were less traffic lights, it'd have been worth more the effort :)

3. After my day at the hospital, i bought my mom her dinner and did some groccery shopping! Supermarkets never fail to bring a smile... Though i would have preferred the queue to be shorter!

4. I thought the last lecture of the day today was quite useful. I feel tt i retained something today! yay!

5. Lastly, seeing the next few pictures really made my day! :)





That's all for now :)

Ohya Weiyan, if u read this post before your bday, i have no idea what the guys have up their sleeves. BUT good luck to you! =)

a New Beginning...

I think sometimes we just have to learn things the hard way.

Say u know something is bound to spoil your day, yet sometimes u actually let it happen...

I think i have to learn to identify what is potentially damaging to my morale, mood and general wellbeing and make the necessary decisions.

Sigh.. I had a funny conversation with a friend a few days back

A: I heard frm shi di wenyang tt shi fu 您老人家 最近心情不太好. 没事吧？
B: 对阿。我老人家身体最近不太硬朗
A: 发生了什么事啊？师父 您老人家要多保重呀! 有什么不开心的 可以找徒儿陪您去散散心 做做蛋糕

Thanks for all these encouragement. I think all thanks to my friends, i am actually sane most of the time

So currently, we're just friends. I hope i feel better aft this decision.

Edit: I just realised tt my prev post just a few hrs ago was a happy one and i'm feeling rather mellow now. Hmm.. i hope this isnt a sign of me being bipolar. After today, i hope i can remove the unhappy part and be consistently happy like i used to be :)

Hey Friend!

Hey Friend!
I'm so happy for you! Jiayou and good luck k! :)

If you think this msg is for you, it certainly is! ;)

Today enhui is leaving for London to do med! He sent us a really cute msg tt ended with "You may say hi to me via my twin till we meet again :)"
It's so funny, i rmbr, once during the first few days of RJC, i called his twin from afar thinking that he was enhui and he was nice enough to listen to what i have to say before telling me he's not enhui.

Also, because i always call enhui ennie, i realise his bro is also 'ennie' too and he'll sometimes respond :) haha

When i read his msg, i got reminded of social night in 2005!

Gosh.. time really flies :)

Heartfelt Words

I've got a lot to say actually, but i do not know where to begin.
Perhaps i may never get started even...

Photos first then :)

I ran around the Chinese High track today and i wondered how diff my life would be if i went to HCJC. I really almost! I still rmbr an hour before JAE close, my first choice was HCJC. Hmm...
Perhaps my run would feel a little more nostalgic today if i havent changed my mind.


This photo was taken at a distance to protect the confidentiality of the car owner. Interesting way of parking huh? :)


Whenever i feel down, i draw strength from people. I'd have a sudden urge to be nice to someone and stimes it's a pleasant surprise to get it reciprocrated. I bought Ann a plastic cover for her matric card and this is what i got in return!


When my CG was at candy empire determined to get Wanzhen sth, we chanced upon the new range of arnott's biscuits. We all laugh and agreed that some of them are a bit heyhey to buy for friends :) But quite fun what!

Hey friends, for those who have noticed tt i've been behaving a bit weirdly, thanks for being understanding. For those who have encouraged me in one way or the other, i really want to thank you and say that i really appreciate all that you have done for me. So sorry that some of you have to bear with all my rubbish... if this sounds like you that i'm refering to, i just want to say tt u may have seen what i'm truly feeling because i felt that you can understand. I have no intention to pour out my unhappiness selfishly, really.

Most importantly, I hope i can solve my problem soon.

Anyway, i got a facebook msg from an old friend and i was SO amazed that he could give such great advice and put all i've always wanted to say into words so accurately and concisely. Wish i have that kinda of ability!

I must say that i am so thankful to have the support of friends. Thanks for all the lame jokes tt made me laugh, the tissue tt dried my tears, the coffee that kept me awake, the drinks tt quench my thirst, the enlightenment tt make me feel less stupid, the listening ear (haha.. or the reading eye) which i needed most.

You guys are the ones who make me tell myself tt i ought to be happier :)

Transition

I like this picture so much! It's been a while since i last saw a caterpillar i must say. I used to adopt them ( i saved them from my grandma who'd kill them all for destroying her plants) and waited for them to morph into butterfiles!
It's such an interesting process tt it's one of those things rmbr best abt my childhood.

Hahaha... come to think of it i kept a lot of things. I kept snails too which anyone who has studied microB will know that it's quite a health hazard. I also kept beetles, crabs and seahorses to list the more exotic ones! I eventually stopped after i learnt how cruel it is to deprive these animals of their freedom.

Anyway, on transitions... Just like how i'm amazed by how caterpillars can turn into butterflies, tadpoles to frogs and ugly ducklings to swans, i'm amazed by how our brains learn! I was just telling nobelle how learning a piano piece can be exciting when u suddenly start to play sth right. The transition from dont know to know after a correct neurone connection is formed is wonderful!

Nobelle can play Croatian rhapsody already and has moved on to exodus. I'm still taking baby steps each day to learn and practise Croatian Rhapsody. Though still a long way to go, i'm still looking forward to playing the entire piece soon! :)

Music & Lyrics Make me Laugh

I've always liked listening to nice music while i drive. Good music is a real life saver when the traffic is bad (esp when i have to control a manual car!) and also great company when u drive home alone.

Today after sending my friends back, songs from music and lyrics played on my way home. I was reminded of how tickled i was by the movie and how morale boosting the OST was before my pros earlier this year.

I was so silly, I sat in the car park and replayed the few songs. Perhaps hoping to find the effect they had on me some months back. Not too bad =) Feeling better.

I hope to break out of this happy-sad-happy-sad cyclical rubbish soon. It's beginning to be quite confusing to me!

Chocolate Craving

Arghh! I'm craving for Chocolate for a dose of endorphin!

Come to think of it, i havent had a piece of chocolate for a very long time. Maybe 3 wks at least when i bought Ferror Rocher at CGH 7-11 and shared it with my student.

Cookies dont count :)

Hope wanzhen's Bday party later has chocolate. haha